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Re: Divorce
There is no substitute for intuition and meeting and observing people, so for someone here to tell PBF he's being paranoid is pretty weak. Bad people put off bad vibes. You should always trust your instincts and feelings about people.
The scenario PBF describes happens all to frequently, and maybe it's his turn to be set upon by bad people. I have stumbled into wilder escapades than that more than once.
If it were me, I would immediately (tomorrow) remove her as my beneficiary and leave everything to my kids, with my parents designated as trustees of the money until they were adults.
As far as filing goes, since her lawyer (who's fee PBF is ultimately paying for since his wife doesn't work) wants $900 to file, I suggest you refuse to file. She will find the $900 somewhere else, maybe her new "friends" will contribute (I somehow doubt it), and it is that much money you will save in the end. If she can't afford her high-priced lawyer, it will only get this over with cheaper and quicker.
Also, it matters very much in the eyes and heart of a judge who is the one who worked to save the marriage and who just wanted to take the money and run. Who actually files is a small part, but a part nonetheless.
There is no "high road" left to take here, other than in your behaviour around your kids, which I assume is fine. Either you let your attorney aggressively defend you, your relationship with your children, and your finances which your children rely on, or you will be left with no finances and no relationship with your children.
You should inform your attorney of your suspicions. He has the resources to confirm or deny them.
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I know what I know. - Paul Simon
I'm ALWAYS right and I NEVER lie. - George C. Tirebiter
Life is tough, it's tougher when you're stupid. - John Wayne
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced. - Frank Zappa
You are responsible for your children until they are a credit to society. - Jovan Banjanin
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