This is a very interesting article that rips our friend Bill Simmons:
Quote:
"And then there are the Pistons, one scorer away from being the equal of any of the bigwigs in the West. Note: I'm in Vegas as I write this, and the Pistons are 10-1 to win the title. They'd be 5-2 with Carmelo. Don't blame me, I'm just the messenger."
I am glad that Simmons can tell us precisely what the Pistons odds would be with Marshmallow on the team.
Excuse me if I don't buy his theory. He is the same ******* who predicted the Pistons would finish sixth in the East this year. Behind the Washington Wizards!!! Oh yeah, and the columnist slotted his home team Celtics third.
And why did he pick the Celts to place? Because a clean and sober Vin Baker would be the difference. OK, OK, clean the coffee and spit off your monitor.
Quote:
"Yeah, but you're still not going to beat the Kings or the Lakers. Trust me on this. And even if you do, you won't have the privilege of watching Melo in person for the next 15 years."
The last time we trusted you, we bet the over on the total number of games that the Wizards would win this year. And unless David Stern agrees to our suggestion of a 110-game season immediately, that cash is gone.
And what the hell is this crap about the privilege of watching Anthony? Oh, is that the same privilege that Atlanta Hawk fans had in watching Dominique Wilkins. We will take the championships, but thanks for thinking of us.
In the last year you have completely lost any basketball credibility that you had left. In the e-mail Simmons sent me a few months ago, he informed me that he was so busy with the Kimmel show that he barely had time to read the Boston Globe. Obviously watching the NBA or spending time crafting quality columns isn't on your agenda anymore either.
Hey Bill, are you even writing this crap or do you have an intern who you instruct to write a normal column but throw in a Hoosiers quote or Teen Wolf 2 mention, bash Darko, throw in a wrestling reset, mention Starbucks, reference your dad, pray to Bird, ***** about your wife/step-mom and criticize Billy Packer? Oh I forgot, you also have to throw in a joke about the day you will be running ESPN6.
This article is great!
A parting shot at Grant Hill:
Quote:
I sure hope Juwan Howard's wife is enjoying the weather in Orlando because I can't imagine her whipped husband had much fun playing for that abortion of a team this season.
I wonder if Tamia Hill and Mrs. Howard take their kids to the same play group. Yeah, you are probably right, Tamia was probably off continuing her ultra-successful music career while Gimpy Albatross played Mr. Mom.
This should be a lesson to Rasheed Wallace: DO NOT LET YOUR WIFE DECIDE WHAT CITY YOU ARE GOING TO PLAY IN!
Earlier in his column, Simmons said that the Darko-Carmelo case would be one that an attorney couldn't lose. Well, we here at the DSR have a new name for the Sports Guy: Christopher Darden.
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If they think we're going into the stands again, then they have the I.Q. of a rabbit. - Stephen Jackson
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My favorite NBA players: Kobe Bryant * Carmelo Anthony * Ben Gordon * Deron Williams * Joe Johnson * Kevin Martin * Tim Duncan * Kyle Lowry * Thad Young * Amare Stoudemire * Dwight Howard * Josh Smith * Brandon Roy * LaMarcus Aldridge * Rudy Gay * Al Horford * Brandan Wright * Craig Smith * Renaldo Balkman
2008-09 Favorite Rookies: Jerryd Bayless (POR), Roy Hibbert (IND), Greg Oden (POR), Jamont Gordon (undrafted), Chris Douglas-Roberts (NJN), Joe Alexander (MIL), Patrick Ewing, Jr. (SAC)
College Basketball: "Where 7-Foot Bigs Foul Out Happen"
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My dream draft prospect at 17 years old - Height w/o shoes 6-11 1/2Height w/ shoes 7-0 3/4Weight 250Wingspan 7-5Standing reach 9-3 1/213 reps of the 185 pound bar
32.5 inch vertical jump (Carmelo has a 33.5)
11.3 lane agility (faster than T.J. Ford or Carmelo)
3/4 court sprint 3.36
That guy is fun to read, but it's hilarious how he makes fun of Bill Simmons for his dumb predictions regarding the Wizards and the Celtics when he has said some of the dumbest things ever about the Pacers.
While it will take a few more months for my defense of the Darko Milicic pick to be proven out, the ***** Carlisle experiment in Indiana has started to play out just like many of us at the DSR thought it would.
After their hot start, the Pacers are 7-8 in their last 15 games. Their recent struggles predictably culminated in the following exchange after Indiana's 82-75 loss to New Jersey at home on Saturday night.
The following is the five-minute diatribe that ***** went on after the loss in which he benched Ron Artest for the entire second half and was ejected for arguing with the refs.
.......
Hahahahahahahaha. Damn, who could have seen this coming? Oh, I don't know, I guess everyone except Larry Bird, the Sports Guy, Stevie Wonder and every other Carlisle apologist in this town. The only surprising aspect of the Pacers meltdown is that it took 29 games to commence.
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The funny thing is that it only took the "immature" Pacers about two months to figure out why Carlisle is an overrated coach. The Detroit media and a large percentage of Pistons fans still are clueless.
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The only thing more amazing than Artest not choking Carlisle to death yet is that the Pistons are on pace to win 47 games and they are playing like total crap.
But I am sure once they adapt to the Hall of Fame coach's style they will blow by Indiana like they are standing still. The question is who will still be on the Pacers at that point. Or better yet, will Carlisle be in one piece?
Good call!
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If they think we're going into the stands again, then they have the I.Q. of a rabbit. - Stephen Jackson
"Darko" Novitski
Of course, I thought you'd never ask.
Well, yeah I was just joking too. Honest. 
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