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Old 08-20-2007, 02:44 PM   #1 (permalink)
Anima
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Taxes

If this seems like one of those banal email forwards you get so often that clog your email, well…admittedly…it is. Gulp! (I actually got this poem in my inbox today.)

I’ve included it because it made me laugh today. I especially like the last paragraph. I’m not a tax evader, but I do recognize waste and misappropriation when I see it (i.e. the $879 million dollars FEMA spent to buy 25,000 manufactured homes for the Katrina refugees that it later realized they were not allowed to put in the New Orlean flood plain).

Tax his land, tax his wage,
Tax his bed in which he lays.
Tax his tractor, tax his mule,
Teach him taxes is the rule.

Tax his cow, tax his goat,
Tax his pants, tax his coat.
Tax his ties, tax his shirts,
Tax his work, tax his dirt.

Tax his tobacco, tax his drink,
Tax him if he tries to think.
Tax his booze, tax his beers,
If he cries, tax his tears.

Tax his bills, tax his gas,
Tax his notes, tax his cash.
Tax him good and let him know
That after taxes, he has no dough.

If he hollers, tax him more,
Tax him until he’s good and sore.
Tax his coffin, tax his grave,
Tax the sod in which he lays.

Put these words upon his tomb,
“Taxes drove me to my doom!”
And when he’s gone, we won’t relax,
We’ll still be after the inheritance TAX,

The above poem was brought to you by the following taxes:
Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel permit tax Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax Interest expense (tax on the money)
Inventory tax IRS Interest Charges (tax on top of tax)
IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service charge taxes
Social Security Tax
Road usage taxes (Truckers)
Sales Taxes
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone federal excise tax
Telephone federal universal service fee tax
Telephone federal, state and local surcharge taxes
Telephone minimum usage surcharge tax
Telephone recurring and non-recurring charges tax
Telephone state and local tax
Telephone usage charge tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax

COMMENTS: Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago and our nation was (then) the most prosperous in the world, had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world and Mom stayed home to raise the kids!

http://tobeapilgrim.wordpress.com/2006/07/25/on-taxes/
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Old 08-20-2007, 04:03 PM   #2 (permalink)
HB
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Re: Taxes

Taxes make my poor head ache
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Old 08-20-2007, 07:07 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Re: Taxes

Quote:
Originally Posted by HB
Taxes make my poor head ache
Funny, they make my prostate sore.
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Old 08-20-2007, 08:10 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Re: Taxes

With apologies to George Harrison...

Let me tell you how it will be
There's one for you, nineteen for me
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman

Should five per cent appear too small
Be thankful I don't take it all
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah I'm the taxman

If you drive a car, I'll tax the street
If you try to sit, I'll tax your seat
If you get too cold I'll tax the heat
If you take a walk, I'll tax your feet

Taxman!
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah I'm the taxman

Don't ask me what I want it for (Aahh Mr. Wilson)
If you don't want to pay some more (Aahh Mr. Heath)
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman

Now my advice for those who die
Declare the pennies on your eyes
'Cause I'm the taxman, yeah, I'm the taxman

And you're working for no one but me
Taxman!
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