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**HKF** · 10-05-2003, 12:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by compsciguy78!

Here is a sample weekend update I created while I was writing this

...The Artist Formerly Known as Prince was in New York to headline a New Year music bonanza including the likes of The Backup Dancer formerly known as Jennifer Lopez, The Black Man Formerly known as Justin Timberlake and the Artist Formerly known as Michael Jackson.....

Have you ever been cow tipping? Apparently you have if you have eaten at Denny's recently....

I think they are cute, but I am telling you right now that you would get a groan from the audience with the first one. The 2nd one is funny however. It took me a second to realize you meant "fat women".

Okay I am going to tell you two ideas that I sent to my contact at SNL to hopefully have them call me back as a writer.

First Idea:

Al Jazeera presents the Best of Al Quaeda. (Behind the scenes outtakes). It shows Osama with a fake gun and the gun falls apart and he says edit that out. It parody's how they are like on some soundstage in the Middle East making these videos. In one of part of the sketch, someone takes Osama's hat and pulls it off his head and shows he is bald. But they edit it out and how the video is sold is in the late night informercial kind of way with Girls Gone Wild.

Second Idea:

Former Celebrities turned Personal Assistants. The “No Shame Agency” works hard to bring all these former stars to you for a small fee. Now you can have Leif Garrett mow your own or Pauley Shore clean your pool. Enjoy laughing at how their careers fizzled and watch them do their terrible shtick till you just want to put their eyes out. Call today and we'll send you Corey Feldman and Scott Baio, for free. Just promise not to return them.

And this last one, I came up with it last nite while I was watching TV.

If you have seen those Girls, Inc. commercials where the Mexican boy is like, you want ditch and go chill, and the girl tells her friends and they say you can't ditch because you're our friend and that is wrong.

So what I thought of is to play the whole thing out where the guy asks to take the white girl out and then those broads cockblock him right, so at the end of the commercial it says,

"Girls Inc... Where Young Girls learn to become Grown A** CockBlockers."

I just thought of another idea for it too, since it was a Mexican guy and a white girl. They could be like we are not going to let you interracial date. Then it could be called,

"Girls Inc. We're all Anglos and we're keeping it that way."

**BizzyRipsta** · 10-05-2003, 01:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MJG!
Armisen is great, I was surprised he was still listed as a featured player rather than a full time guy. Overall, I didn't really care for last night's show. There were individual jokes or moments that made me laugh, but as a whole I came away thinking "I hope this isn't how the whole season will go".

fred armisen's the man!

**BizzyRipsta** · 10-05-2003, 01:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by newmessiah10!
I liked Finesse but did he really have to do his stand up act from a couple of years ago on WU set.

finesse is pretty good looking.

**Peja Vu** · 10-05-2003, 01:17 PM

The "Huggies Thongs" commercial was gross and not funny

compsciguy78 · 10-05-2003, 06:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by newmessiah10!

I think they are cute, but I am telling you right now that you would get a groan from the audience with the first one. The 2nd one is funny however. It took me a second to realize you meant "fat women".

Okay I am going to tell you two ideas that I sent to my contact at SNL to hopefully have them call me back as a writer.

First Idea:

Al Jazeera presents the Best of Al Quaeda. (Behind the scenes outtakes). It shows Osama with a fake gun and the gun falls apart and he says edit that out. It parody's how they are like on some soundstage in the Middle East making these videos. In one of part of the sketch, someone takes Osama's hat and pulls it off his head and shows he is bald. But they edit it out and how the video is sold is in the late night informercial kind of way with Girls Gone Wild.

Second Idea:

Former Celebrities turned Personal Assistants. The “No Shame Agency” works hard to bring all these former stars to you for a small fee. Now you can have Leif Garrett mow your own or Pauley Shore clean your pool. Enjoy laughing at how their careers fizzled and watch them do their terrible shtick till you just want to put their eyes out. Call today and we'll send you Corey Feldman and Scott Baio, for free. Just promise not to return them.

And this last one, I came up with it last nite while I was watching TV.

If you have seen those Girls, Inc. commercials where the Mexican boy is like, you want ditch and go chill, and the girl tells her friends and they say you can't ditch because you're our friend and that is wrong.

So what I thought of is to play the whole thing out where the guy asks to take the white girl out and then those broads cockblock him right, so at the end of the commercial it says,

"Girls Inc... Where Young Girls learn to become Grown A** CockBlockers."

I just thought of another idea for it too, since it was a Mexican guy and a white girl. They could be like we are not going to let you interracial date. Then it could be called,

"Girls Inc. We're all Anglos and we're keeping it that way."

Both of those ideas were freakin hilarious. I love the pulling off of Osama's hat and he is bald(that kind of reminds me of Naked Gun when he rubs Gorbachev's spot off his head with a rag and says "I knew it!")

Pauly Shore cleaning you're pool! That is funny stuff. I would take Scott Baio for free, but not Corey Feldman...

Those are good skits...you didn't get a bite with those? I would say keep trying because that is good material. I think the way to break in nowadays is to write a complete movie script. Look how many Hollywood guys have done this, creating a movie out of nothing and getting instant credibility and fame...Ben Affleck, Matt Damon are some of the names.

If I was to write a movie it would be in the vein of Austin Powers or similar.

**HKF** · 10-05-2003, 07:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by compsciguy78!

Both of those ideas were freakin hilarious. I love the pulling off of Osama's hat and he is bald(that kind of reminds me of Naked Gun when he rubs Gorbachev's spot off his head with a rag and says "I knew it!")

Pauly Shore cleaning you're pool! That is funny stuff. I would take Scott Baio for free, but not Corey Feldman...

Those are good skits...you didn't get a bite with those? I would say keep trying because that is good material. I think the way to break in nowadays is to write a complete movie script. Look how many Hollywood guys have done this, creating a movie out of nothing and getting instant credibility and fame...Ben Affleck, Matt Damon are some of the names.

If I was to write a movie it would be in the vein of Austin Powers or similar.

Oh don't worry I have written a movie. I am currently trying to finish two of my sitcoms that I am writing plus I am in the process of writing 4 movies right now. It is just a lot work for not much money right now. But don't worry when these things get on the air they will be good stuff.

mofo202 · 10-05-2003, 07:05 PM

This is all fine and dandy. Chuck, go on AIM, I wanna kno wats been goin on lately.

Lizzy · 10-06-2003, 08:04 AM

The news update thing about Crouching Tiger did seem like an old stand-up bit. Is that what you were talking about, BDA?

Overall it was ok but they need to take things a step farther. That Qeer Ete skit could have been funnier. It's like they come up with a concept and let that do all the work.

The Yankees Superheros made me laugh.

**HKF** · 10-06-2003, 10:02 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lizzy!
The news update thing about Crouching Tiger did seem like an old stand-up bit. Is that what you were talking about, BDA?

Overall it was ok but they need to take things a step farther. That Qeer Ete skit could have been funnier. It's like they come up with a concept and let that do all the work.

The Yankees Superheros made me laugh.

Exactly Lizzy. He did that the routine on Comicview one time, but I took it as them breaking him in slowly. It is pretty funny because he was supposed to talk about Denzel's movie and ended up doing his act and it was choppy as hell. I guess they meant for him to do that, not great but not horrible.

The Yankees thing was okay, but Smigel is losing it. 4 years ago that would have been hilarious. Now I am not so sure he can even write them funny anymore.

Lizzy · 10-06-2003, 12:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by newmessiah10!

Exactly Lizzy. He did that the routine on Comicview one time, but I took it as them breaking him in slowly. It is pretty funny because he was supposed to talk about Denzel's movie and ended up doing his act and it was choppy as hell. I guess they meant for him to do that, not great but not horrible.

That bit seemed easy enough that he could have rewritten it for a current movie. He'd have to come up with a different ending but that isn't too hard.

jokeaward · 10-06-2003, 01:42 PM

It's still funny.

I especially liked Chris Parnell in the sauce sketch. Vazquez was funny too. hehe

**Louie** · 10-06-2003, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Minstrel
To me, Darrell Hammond is a perfect case. His Clinton or Gore imitations were as poor as I or any random person on the street could do (clipped Southern accent for Clinton, ponderous Southern accent for Gore...wow, talent), and the writing was incredibly poor political satire. The result was sketches that really weren't very entertaining at all, in my opinion.

You crappin' me?

Seriously though, Darrell Hammond is the best impressionist in the buisness today, IMO- one of the lone bright spots of the show. His Gore impression, IMO, was dead-on, and who could deny the hilarity of him as Sean Connery on "Celebrity Jeopardy"? His Phil Donahue is also hilarious, IMO.

As for SNL, they definitely need to upgrade their talent. Until then, they need to just let Jimmy Fallon and Horatio Sanz do more skits- those guys are really funny together. Over the past few years, it was worth it to watch the show just for Will Ferrell, the best cast member the show has ever had IMO, but now I usually can't watch past the first half hour. Armisen is pretty good, but IMO Amy Poehler, Jeff Richards, and Maya Rudolph are all crap. The jury's still out on Meyers and Forte, but they haven't really impressed me yet.

OZZY · 10-06-2003, 06:06 PM

Best episode ever?

Since we are on the topic of SNL, what is the best episode you have ever seen?

Mine would have to be, Steve Buscemi Apr 4 1998 - Ep. 1038

Come on anyone agree

True I have not seen all of the episodes but if you watched that Steve Buscemi one I bet you thought it was great just like I did.

**MJG** · 10-06-2003, 06:15 PM

While I've only seen the 1 hour Comedy Central version of it, the Jim Carrey/Soundgarden episode (late 90's) is definitely my favorite.

**Peja Vu** · 10-06-2003, 07:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MJG!
While I've only seen the 1 hour Comedy Central version of it, the Jim Carrey/Soundgarden episode (late 90's) is definitely my favorite.

Also Matthew Perry /Oasis and Norm MacDonald/Dr. Dre

10-05-2003, 01:17 PM	#34 (permalink)
Peja Vu MANRAM! Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: NORCAL Age: 28 Posts: 18,056 Rep Power: 5209392	The "Huggies Thongs" commercial was gross and not funny __________________ POST ON THE KINGS BOARD!!! Peja Vu's Playhouse!!!

10-06-2003, 08:04 AM	#38 (permalink)
Lizzy Star Join Date: May 2002 Location: CHICAGO! Posts: 3,175 Rep Power: 2413	The news update thing about Crouching Tiger did seem like an old stand-up bit. Is that what you were talking about, BDA? Overall it was ok but they need to take things a step farther. That Qeer Ete skit could have been funnier. It's like they come up with a concept and let that do all the work. The Yankees Superheros made me laugh. __________________ "This is Chi-town," a fired-up Chandler said. "Nobody is shushing us."

10-06-2003, 06:15 PM	#44 (permalink)
MJG Only khal-khalash. Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Northern Virginia Favorite Team: Wizards Age: 30 Posts: 15,963 Rep Power: 255504	While I've only seen the 1 hour Comedy Central version of it, the Jim Carrey/Soundgarden episode (late 90's) is definitely my favorite. __________________ Washington Wizards Fans (Click here to join!) MJG \| popeyejones54 \| NBA4life \| TheRifleman \| THE NBA GAZETTE \| NorthEast Wiz \| local_sportsfan \| Tom \| sagebrush \| C-MO 22 LD \| adarsh1 \| Ice \| rukahS capuT \| dazed-and-confused \| DaUnbreakableKinG \| erickboy22 \| DaBullz \| Epadfield \| twinz2gether \| AL9045 \| shonin \| BrandinKnightFan3 \| << SkipToMyLou >> \| Dualie \| Carter182 \| QuiksilverMaggette \| BrYaNBaIlEy06 \| StraylightRunner \| bullet for life \| pG_prIDe \| IggytoWiz_at5 \| teddyguy \| SilentOneX \| FanOfAll8472 \| HoopsAvenue05 \| viviki \| eYeKey \| DwyaneWade4MVP \| KidCanada101 \| PejaWebber \| B Dizzle \| byrondarnell66 \| LakerLunatic \| wiz kid

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10-05-2003, 07:05 PM	#37 (permalink)
mofo202 Veteran Join Date: Apr 2003 Age: 24 Posts: 2,234 Rep Power: 14130	This is all fine and dandy. Chuck, go on AIM, I wanna kno wats been goin on lately.

10-06-2003, 01:42 PM	#41 (permalink)
jokeaward Legend Join Date: May 2003 Location: Élan Posts: 10,046 Rep Power: 5458610	It's still funny. I especially liked Chris Parnell in the sauce sketch. Vazquez was funny too. hehe

10-06-2003, 06:06 PM	#43 (permalink)
OZZY All-Star Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Minnesota Age: 29 Posts: 6,756 Rep Power: 20795	Best episode ever? Since we are on the topic of SNL, what is the best episode you have ever seen? Mine would have to be, Steve Buscemi Apr 4 1998 - Ep. 1038 Come on anyone agree True I have not seen all of the episodes but if you watched that Steve Buscemi one I bet you thought it was great just like I did.

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