Zach

Time for Part II of Zach's Stuff That I Hate Collection...


I don't like Oprah Winfrey. I don't hate her, but I don't like her. She has too much power and influence. That can be a bad things at times. Hitler had a ****load of power and influence and look at what he did to Europe.

I don't dislike Oprah because of her talk show. I am sure it is rather good. I don't watch it because I have a penis. However, I know of people that do. I like hearing about her charity work and foundations. That is all fine and dandy. I am all for the bettering of today's youth, in America or abroad. However, there seems to be a minor snafu when it comes to her educational influence. That would be the Oprah Winfrey Book Club.

The book club started in 1996 with her selection of _________.( I will not insert the book's name or author because doing so would go back on my beliefs, and that is bull****.) Since then many books that she has recommended have gone on to become best sellers again. Nothing wrong with that, right? That is not the point. The major problem with the book club is that middle-aged housewives who watch her show hear her suggestions and say to themselves, "You know what, that does sound like a good book. I should read it." **** THAT ****! You are 45 years old, you have raised a family thus far, and you should be old enough to decide what books you want to read on your ****ing own.

The fact that there are so many dumb ***es who will actually leave their house and spend $30 on a book because some lady with a TV show says so just shows how stupid we are as Americans. We are adults and we can decide if we are going to read 'Love In The Time of Cholera'(1*) without Miss Pontiac Give-Aways(2*) opinion. I have read one of Oprah's 'chosen few'. I read it without her approval. I liked it. End of story, now back to her bull****.

I know a few people who read her suggested crap. They say they liked the books that she recommended. How the **** do we know that? Maybe they would have hated but because Oprah said it was a classic, that book is now the best book in the history of Ink, Paper, and Alcohol(3*).

I have an idea that would make the Oprah Winfrey Book Club awesome. She should divert the book club to children. Because if anyone needs to read, it is the dumb-****s that parents have decided to let roam the Earth without a good smack to the face once in a while. If the book club was directed towards kids, that would be great. That way the middle-aged fat wenches that watch her show would hear her recommend 'One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish'(4*) and they would get the book for their little ****-head tax breaks. Maybe then, our youth can do better than those ****ing Norwegians on American History tests.


References:

1*: This is the most recent book selected by Oprah, in September. But **** you I will not tell you the author.

2*: Oprah didn't pay **** for those Pontiacs, it was a ****ing publicity action by Pontiac. So stop giving her credit.

3*: The best books are written by Alcoholics, if not, borderline Alcoholics. With the exception of 'To Kill A Mockingbird' by Harper Lee.

4*: The best Children's Book ever.

Peja Vu

My mom reads all the Oprah books. She has to get the books with the Oprah sticker on the cover, and has them all on a shelf together. Pretty silly.

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