Zach

Alright, new game.

The name of the game is "Douchebag". The object is to be as big of a douchebag as possible in the fewest amount of turns.Many people start it off by popping their collar. The opponent will counteract that by getting some Japanese symbols tattooed onto their arm. The funny thing is they think their arms says hope and love when it actually says nail and fiberglass. What ****ing idiots. The game has been known to go on for years without a winner to the point where the players have chains that go down to their dicks and four children to 3 women. But these do not guarantee victory. Only one thing does: Sunglasses at Night.
The World's Biggest Douchebag and some coke fiend.


There is one person on this planet who is allowed to wear sunglasses at night and that person is Jack Nicholson. That is because Jack Nicholson was the first person to do it and he is a bad *** mother ****er.

The sad thing about the sunglass idiocratic movement is that the people that wear them at night these days(Rappers) are actually influencing overdeveloped cumshots to wear them. As if to say, "Hey you don't look dumb enough, wear these at midnight." Unless these *****s are in Alaska at a time when the sun is out 24 hours a day get that **** off your head. I can count way too many people around this campus wearing sunglasses when the 14 streetlights that Tucson has are turned on. And it's goddamn annoying. If my dad saw me wearing these shaded ocular aides at night he would invoke the wrath of his higher power on me.

In closing, I leave this message to everyone who wears sunglasses after the sun is not out: Take them off or I will have to go to jail. And we all know at 19, I am too young to go to jail for killing some douchebag.

Have a great ****ing weekend, everyone that isn't a douchebag. You know who you are.